Progress, Not Perfection

I’ve been home for almost a month now and I’m getting back into the swing of things at work and in my personal life.  In a perfect world I would be able to tell you that I haven’t strayed at all from my SOS Free WFPB Diet.  It hasn’t been a perfect world.  I’ve stuck to things pretty well, but I have had my stumbles.  Luckily those stumbles have been accompanied with painful consequences–stabbing pains and the like.

I’ve mentioned before my struggle with an all-or-nothing mentality.  A phrase that keeps going through my mind whenever I start heading down that road–thinking that I’ve made a mistake so I may as well give up–is the phrase, “progress not perfection” and I am reminded that mistakes are a part of the process.  Mistakes do not define me or this process.  Mistakes shine a light on the areas where I need to buckle down and try harder.  Mistakes remind me that this is a process. Mistakes temper arrogance, make room for humility and remind me of my need for divine assistance.  Mistakes remind me to practice forgiveness and motivate me to look at my process and see what needs to be tweaked.

Yes, I’ve made mistakes.  But I am also making progress.  And one day the moments progress of will outnumber the mistakes.  My focus needs to remain on the progress, not the perfection.

One of the things I haven’t been doing is following the chart that Dr. Lisle set out for me.  I will start that tomorrow.  I will make a separate page on which to track that.

I have been taking the Online Culinary Boot Camp offered by Katie Mae, one of the culinary instructors at True North.  It has been fabulous.  Katie is such a creative and thoughtful instructor.  Initially I wondered if it would be worth the cost, but she has provided a great value: recipes, menu plans, recipe demonstration videos, coaching calls, keynote trainings, an online community and more.  I’m so glad I decided to do it.  I think it will really reinforce my knowledge of eating this way and being able to prepare dishes that are tasty, healthy and full of flavor.  Here is a picture of a beautiful salad that I made as one of my lessons:

kale

I also joined a 90-day transformation at my gym.  If I’m being completely honest, I was a bit apprehensive about this.  I have great memories of doing them in the past, but I also have memories of getting caught up in the competition and of what overdoing the exercise did to my body the last few times I competed.  I feared that throwing myself back into a physically grueling routine would send my adrenals running back into their fatigued state.  Long story, short, I was fearful.  But, I really need to get back into the habit of regular consistent exercise. I’m taking it easy.  When the trainer asked me to set goals, they were simple, establish a routine of regular exercise, get enough sleep, eat correctly.  I have my starting stats that I will share in another post. I am confident that I can do this in a balanced way that will benefit me rather than harm me.

The day I left for True North I was 327, which is 10 pounds heavier than I weighed on my first day at True North.  The transverse also occurred upon return–my scale at home weighed me 10 pounds heavier the day I returned home than I weighed my last day at True North.  So, for consistency purposes, I’m using the numbers on my home scale.  This morning I weighed in at 305, so I’m still down 22 pounds.  Gratefully the scale has started to show me some favor the past few days and things finally seem to be on the downhill slope again. If we are going from my all-time high weight of 355, then I’m down 50 pounds.  I just can’t be upset about that in any way.

My blood pressure numbers remain excellent.  I range anywhere from 107/64 to 128/75.  I’ll take it!

One of the dark corners of my life that my recent mistakes have shined a giant light on is the fact that I have struggled for a long time and still battle with an eating disorder.  I’m a compulsive over eater with a food addiction.  As I look back on my life it is clear to me that this was a problem for me beginning in my early teens.  I used to sneak hands full of chocolate chips when I thought no one was looking and eat them in the bathroom.  I would be careful to not take so many as they would be noticed, but enough that my cravings would be momentarily satiated.  I complained a lot about being stuck doing the dishes, but secretly I loved clearing the table and putting the left overs in the fridge because then I could pick at the things that I like and continue my dinner beyond dinner time.  How I made it to adulthood with these inclinations without being fat, I will never know–I probably owe it to my parents feeding me really good foods and the fact that I was so active.  I can definitely see that these tendencies increase when I am dealing with stress.  I am grateful that there are many who have traveled this road before and are willing to share their journey so I can see the light at the end of the tunnel.  More on this later.

So, there is my latest update.  Hopefully I’ll be writing more often.  Take care.

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One response

  1. Wow, one amazing, honest, post! I learned a lot from this. Thanks so much for sharing. You are awesome, Teresa! I’ll be sharing this post with others!! [discoveringthewordofwisdom.com]

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